I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
