How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
