Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
