I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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