just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Randomize
