I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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