Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
