Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
