But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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