I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
