I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize