girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize