hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Randomize
