do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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