So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
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I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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