Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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