He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
