I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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