i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
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