you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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