i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
