yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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