i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize