Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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