Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid

(1-405): View more from Oklahoma

Oh.My.God.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table

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(651): View more from Minnesota

i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.

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(563): View more from Iowa

i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(937): View more from Ohio

My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.

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(516): View more from New York

I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.

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(269): View more from Michigan

We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!

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(210): View more from Texas

Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?

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