grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
