glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
