3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
