Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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