take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
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