You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
