JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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