He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
