hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
