So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
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For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
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How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize