Are we in a gay sports bar?
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
