they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize
