so explain again why im purple
no
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
