I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
