what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize
