My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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