oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Randomize
