The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
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