were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
