The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
