I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
