I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Randomize
