Hey man sorry I got all grabby
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
nutella sex= disaster
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Randomize
