Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
