Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
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he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
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Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I think I just sharted jello shots
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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