turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
